Judy Kiar Counselling

Judy Kiar Counselling

Individual, Couple, and Family Therapist

Blog posts

2010

Maybe you’re more normal than you think…

3 minute read

Published:

One of the things that often happen, when people come in for therapy, is that they almost apologize for their feelings or experiences, as though I might be offended, upset or shocked at what I’m hearing. Almost everyone who cries in my office says, “I’m sorry” as they reach for the tissues. We seem to have a universal shame at showing our distress and potentially upsetting someone else. The irony is that we all feel sad sometimes, we all cry, we all complain, we all go through periods of frustration and despair. Most of us feel compassion when we recognize those feelings in someone else.

2009

Fostering a Secure Attachment in Your Baby

5 minute read

Published:

As this is my first newsletter it seemed fitting that I start at the beginning and talk about infant attachment. John Bowlby’s Attachment Theory is one that really resonates with me. Basically it says that in the first two to three years of life, children learn about themselves and other people based on how they have been treated by their primary caregivers.

Profile on Judy Kiar

5 minute read

Published:

Like many people, I have experience with mental illness, if what you mean by mental illness is depression, sadness, despair, grief, anxiety and a lack of faith in myself and everyone else. Like many people I have felt hopeless and helpless and didn’t know if I could face another day. I guess that sums up a lot of how a person feels when they are suffering from mental illness. If you look at it that way mental illness almost seems normal.

2006

It’s too easy to hide abuse

1 minute read

Published:

Human beings seem to have an unshakable need for the events of their lives to make sense. We seek reasons and justifications for everything from bad grades to terminal illnesses. Being treated badly is no exception. In working with victims of all forms of abuse occurring in all stages of life, I have witnessed their almost universal belief that in some way they were to blame for the otherwise inexplicable abuse they suffered.

2005

Pain wears us down

1 minute read

Published:

Suicide is an individual’s response to extreme pain without hope of remission. Pain can be physical or emotional. It can be attributed to illness or it can be harder to explain. Living with pain of any kind wears us down, limits our range of choice and robs us of our ability to engage in life to the fullest. While most of us have difficulty coping with simple temporary pain, such as a toothache, we can’t comprehend life with ongoing, debilitating chronic pain, whatever its cause.

2004

Provide a road map

less than 1 minute read

Published:

I work very closely with family physicians, psychologists and other mental-health professionals. We are struggling to find appropriate psychiatric treatment for our clients in crisis and in need of on-going management of their psychiatric medications. We feel unsupported and unrecognized within the psychiatric establishment, which seems more like an impenetrable fortress than a part of a comprehensive mental-health system.

City has wide range of mental-health services

1 minute read

Published:

Through provincial mental health reform initiatives, the psychiatric emergency service that was provided through the Royal Ottawa Hospital was transferred to The Ottawa Hospital in 2000.

We must do much more to help those who see suicide as option

2 minute read

Published:

Psychiatric supports are sorely lacking in our community – even in our hospitals. Family physicians, psychologists, social workers and psychotherapists are the first line of defence in treating people with mental illness. Sometimes, though, these professionals are not enough to care for their clients and keep them safe.